Category Archives: Attractions

Too Fat To Ride

This isn’t new news, but it is crazy news. From calorielab.com:

In the original Anaheim Disneyland it may be a Small World after all, but that world’s inhabitants are getting bigger and heavier almost by the day, so much so that some of the rides may have to be re-engineered. The problem, quite simply, is that the flume that the boats ride in, and the boats themselves, were designed and built in 1963 on the assumption that the male adult riders would average 175 pounds and the women about 135, which they pretty much did at the time. The ride now must accommodate adults who frequently weigh north of 200 pounds, which it often cannot do. Increasingly, overweighted boats get to certain points in the ride and bottom out, becoming stuck in the flume.

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How To Take a Little Kid On a Really Scary Ride


I just got back from my Disney trip with my boyfriend and his family—his brother, his brother’s wife, and his 7-year-old niece, AB. I must admit I was a little nervous about spending so much time around a kid, because although I act like a kid and work around kidstuff all day, the actual amount of contact I have with actual children is very low.

We all got along great, though, and had a great time. I had been told how shy AB was, but she warmed up to me quickly. I attribute this to the fact I played Rock, Paper, Scissors with her for about seven hours straight, “secret” hand motions included, went down the slide with her at the Polynesian about 20 times, and allowed her to play with my iPhone.

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Save a Ride – Go to the Carousel of Progress

In a corner of Tomorrowland that you’d miss if you weren’t looking for it there’s an old classic called “Carousel of Progress”. If you love Disney this is not news to you, but when was the last time you saw the show? It was personally created by Walt Disney for the 1964-65 New York World’s Fair and the rotating theater  tells the story of the evolution of technology in the 20th century.

It’s lame and bordering on “so bad it’s good”, but I love it.  The dad is a goofball that talks in clichés about his family and the last scene – the “modern scene” needs a serious update. It’s obvious that they are losing interest in it because the seats in the theater are falling apart and the carpet is worn.

Compared to the newer attractions it might seem silly but you can’t really compare it to the newer attractions. It’s Disney history – think of it as a museum. It’s a glimpse of old timey Disney, of Walt himself. Don’t let it die! Go on your next visit so that they don’t do anything crazy, like retire it.

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The New Improved Star Tours Is Open

The entire attraction has been upgraded, even the queue, and it’s  3D courtesy of Industrial Light and Magic. It sounds great, but I’ll bet it still makes me feel like puking.

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What the Eff Do I Do with a 7-Year-Old In Disney World?

She hasn't been there with a child since she was one. (And even then, she swore. A LOT.)

I know I just returned from Disney World, but in true Lauren form, I’m on my way back again at the beginning of June. (Lucky me!) This time will be different, though. This time, Mom won’t be there. My boyfriend (whom for legal reasons shall be referred to as NEIL from this moment forward) and I are meeting up with Neil’s brother, his sister-in-law, and his seven-year-old niece.

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I Don’t Want To Work, I Just Want To Bang On Todd Rundgren’s Head All Day

Woody dancing to "Bang on my Drum"

Todd Rundgren is officially my favorite singer/ musician/songwriter/artist and I’ve liked him since my husband played me “A Wizard A True Star” on our first date when I was 19. He’s a musical genius who must have pissed somebody in the music industry off since he’s still not in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Van Halen is in there but Todd isn’t. Abba but not Todd Rundgren.

He’s released dozens of albums as a solo artist and with his band “Utopia” and produced ones for Meat Loaf  (Bat Out of Hell), Patti Smith, and Janis Joplin. But he’s not in the Rock Hall of Fame. Continue reading

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Fun Fact #1 – Splash Mountain

In the Magic Kingdom ride “Splash Mountain”, the ride that tells the story of Br’er Rabit, Br’er Bear and Br’er Fox and dumps you into the briar patch from the top of Chickapin Hill, there’s something you may have missed if you were too were too busy worrying about the drop. Right before it, from the roof of a cave, a little gopher pops out and says, “Go FSU!”

Apparently one of the imagineers that worked on the ride was a Florida Univerity alumnus and worked it in as a joke. When I first heard about it I thought it was just a rumor, but if you watch and listen, you’ll see that it’s true.

Go FSU!

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Save The Planet? That’s Kimpossible.

Kim PossibleOn our last day at Disney World Lauren and I shoved aside and knocked down a bunch of 8-year-old girls and a couple of boys to be next in line to partner up with Kim Possible to save the earth. Kim is an animated teenage crime fighter who gives anyone with a little courage and a half hour to kill the chance to complete a mission and vanquish crime. Kim Possible stations are located around EPCOT for everyone who wants to give it a try. I didn’t see any other adults doing it, but I think we were just the only ones who weren’t too chicken. Continue reading

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Disney Boners for Dads

It’s the little things that make Disney World so great, wouldn’t you agree? I love Disney rides and the food and fireworks, but what I really love is watching creepy dads watch the belly dancer in EPCOT’s Morocco.

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The American Idol Experience at Walt Disney World

I’m home, and laughing to myself a little when I’m explaining to people that we didn’t go into the Magic Kingdom or Animal Kingdom even once the whole time we were at Walt Disney World. We watched the fireworks over the castle from the California Grill on the roof of the Contemporary Resort, but that was it.

What did we do? For one thing, we went to “The American Idol Experience” at Disney Hollywood Studios three times – well, I did. Lauren went twice. I’m a little obsessed with it now, and I’m kind of dying to see if any of the winners we saw will ever make it to the real show. Continue reading

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