Lauren I was 5 the first time I went to Disney World and I distinctly remember exactly what I was thinking as I set sail to the Pirates of the Caribbean, the indoor boat ride that takes you through a Caribbean town being ransacked by sex-craving, drunk, pillaging pirates. As our boat eased into the waters and drifted past the backdrop of an endless Caribbean sea, I thought, “How did they get the whole ocean in this room?”
Maybe I was retarded. Or maybe Disney World is just really, really awesome.
I would kill to have that excitement again, that wonder, that bewilderment. And every kid should experience that feeling. I still have my moments – when I’m looking at stars, sometimes, or thinking about how much ass a T-Rex could probably kick, but Disney World brings this magic to millions of people every day. For one sweet moment, these kids are in pirate land. Then they’re cowboys. Then they’re drinking rum they smuggled into the park under their underpants band. Oh wait. We’re talking about me now. But they have that to look forward to.
Every single corner of the entire property (which is, by the way, twice the size of the island of Manhattan) has been painstakingly designed by teams of “Imagineers” who plan out sights, smells, sounds, and uses of space that leave you feeling like you are anywhere but central Florida. You feel like you’re in the caves of the South West, you feel like you’re on a rocket in space, you feel like you’re dining beneath an Aztec Pyramid, you feel like you’re fleeing from dinosaurs.
I see boys running around in raccoon caps and girls spinning in princess dresses and hats. They look just like I did (I had one of those pink princess hats!) on my first visit. Some things, like girls wearing princess hats, boys wearing raccoon caps, should never change. At work, I hear about little girls obsessed with going to the salon and worrying that they’re too fat and idolizing over-sexed pop stars. In Disney World, they escape this real world and get to run around on a way larger-than-life playground all day, where every single thing was created to make them feel magical.